Sunday, March 27, 2011

Take your father/ mother to school days

On a "Start a new post" momtwo wrote:

"The March 23rd Board Legislative meeting included time devoted to Mr. Brentley bring forth items related to Take Your Father to School Day and a new day proposed to salute Moms/Females who keep the kids and schools moving forward. A sampling of comments from building administrators was read twice and Mr. Brentley responded with controlled umbrage. As much as one might admire his devotion to the cause and the spirit of the day(s) he supports and proposes, his efforts might be better spent developing a new idea with the same goal.

As a parent who volunteered for the Take Your Father to School Day I must say it takes a lot of energy and focus to maintain order that day."


Anonymous said...

This day is an absolute joke.

Mark Rauterkus said...

What is a "joke" is how the doors to our schools are slammed in the faces of dads -- every day of the year.

Anonymous said...

Can you think of anything more important than providing opportunities for Dads (and Moms) to be welcomed into the school community in a purposeful, positive way?

Shame on 'whatever' or 'whoever' discourages such an initiative!

How often (on this blog) do we read denouncements of parents who are not involved? Now, its a "joke." Hmmm.

Anonymous said...

It depends on the school. Some come up with a nice little program and manage to do it well.

However, in elementary school? There are kids who don't have someone come in. Many kids are fine with that, but I guarantee you that there are two or three per classroom who are not fine. Or who were told someone was coming and then they don't show up. The teacher and the rest of the class gets to deal with the resulting sadness, which usually ends up quickly being defiance and rage.

I've also seen some excellent community males make a huge effort to see the kids they know won't have anyone there. Reverends and coaches and various more distant relatives, all making an effort to make as many of the kids they know feel like someone is there for them.

Anonymous said...

Our schools should be open to parents as visitors and volunteers but the day in may devoted to the purpose of getting dads in the door is a nightmare in some buildings. Get the numbers at the high school level and then discuss an alternative for those buildings. The preparation is heavy for so low turnout. Perhaps an RSVP should be required. Another thought is to make the day one where the parent who has been unresponsive to poor work notices or phone calls home must sit down with a teacher and student to iron things out to ensure a positive end to the school year for the student.

As far as doors getting slammed in faces, that has never been my experience.

lisa said...

The day is only a waste if it takes away prime educational time. Time spent organizing coffee and donuts or kickball games or the like is silly. Dads who come in for a one day program would be better served by seeing ways they can help support their child every day of the year. Dads are always welcome at PTO meetings or open house or in various volunteer capacities, as well as providing homework help at home.

Anonymous said...

Mark, there you go again.

I didn't realize that you have a teaching certificate. If not, perhaps you ought to do a bit of reading before you embarrass yourself once again. There's a good reason doors are "slammed in the faces" of dads and other non-district staff.

You wouldn't appreciate a diversion at one of your swim meets. Why is this different?

Mark Rauterkus said...

I'm sure that they don't give teaching certificates to Anonymous.

I never said I had, nor did I ever aspire to obtain a classroom 'teaching certificate.'

There you go again as in bully and personal attacks. Sounds like OT.

So, to put this in perspective, some posters here never witness the doors slamming and others are in support of it. Great common ground.

Then it was stated: "You wouldn't appreciate a diversion at one of your swim meets. Why is this different?"

Bad example, IMHO. We should and often do welcome spectators and support at swimming meets and other athletic events.

I never called for a "diversion" for diversion's sake. But, life is often about diversions. To improve, we need to change. A change is a diversion. To better, we need to engage -- and engagement can be a diversion.

To get "significant males" (i.e., fathers) into the schools, we need to divert them from outside, into the parking lots, into the hallways, and into the classrooms and even into acts of support for learning.

For some, doing nothing can be seen as no diversion. Perspectives matter.

Going out of your way to help is a diversion too.

Anonymous said...

As usual some people seem to want it both ways. It seems that the same people who complain about the lack of involvement from parents, mother or father, are the same ones that complain that an event of this sort will interrupt "prime educational time". Do these same people complain about losing prime educational time because of field trips or the PTO sponsored "fun days" (that last all day and have no educational value.

I have been in different schools during the take a father to school day, and I have never seen the looks of pride on these childrens faces when they were allowed to introduce their father, grandfather or even an older brother to their teacher. Self esteem is important, even to a grade school age child. Children are more sophistacated and wise than they are given credit for. They are intuitive and will make life determining decisions about how they and their families are perceived to be treated. The most powerful influences a child has is their parents first and then the educators that they see for 6 to 7 hours a day. Education is not only about 1+1=2, its also about helping a child find his or her way in an ever more hurtful world.

Anonymous said...

Some of us are worried too about the inconsolable child who might have been "stood up" by his significant adult. Lots of proud faces, I am sure. If there were a guarantee of enough volunteer clergy or community members to go around some of us might feel completely positive about the day.

lisa said...

Yep I do complain about field trips and assemblies and "fun days " that add little to the educational experience. There are too many of these type of things during class time and I am NOT in favor of them.

Bring parents to school for open house, parent teacher conferences, PTO meetings,or volunteer activities. Class time is too precious to waste.

Anonymous said...

I have had two parents in 15 years

Some parents block their phone numbers so the school can not call them about their child's behavior.

I do get alot of parent for Open House.

Anonymous said...

As a City Football Coach, During Senior Night. I can not tell you how many seniors football players and cheerleaders I have walked with because they do not have a parent at the event. It breaks my heart, but I do feel honored. It is realy sad when they think some is going to show up and no one does, that the worst. I have seen multiple coaches & teachers walk with kids during realy bad years. It does vary from year to year

Anonymous said...

Maybe the effort needs to be limited to elementary grades.

Anonymous said...

7:29 -- my experience is only at elementary grades and if anything it's worst there. Kids crying, kids refusing to do any work, kids getting angrier and angrier and finally losing it -- yelling at another student or at a teacher, knocking over a chair, etc.

One school had the parents do an activity with the kids, outside of the classroom. That at least worked better, because then all the kids left behind were in the same boat. Well, except for the ones who were convinced that someone was coming in and that person didn't show up.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

I guess I'm a little wary of such days. My history has been of fathers smelling of booze or 'hitting' on me. My history has been of fathers actually disrupting class. My history has been of fathers who want to show the world that they are hands-on with their kids' lives but as time goes by, you learn that it's only window dressing, that they are generally absentee fathers.
This idea simply is the diversion from instruction they speak of above.